New Year Once Again...
As I predicted me and Barker didn't work out too well, it's still very confused and complicated, but then again everyone says their relationships are, even though from everyone else's point of view they're stupidly simple...
I think we wanted different things, 'cause he completely ignores me when his friends are there (except Dash), but then when we're alone it's a battle to get him away from me! For example:
On Wednesday night I decided I was going to come to my dad's house, as my internet wire at my mum's is broken, and Becca was going into town so I agreed I'd hang out with them for a while. Anyway, it turned out Barker was with them and in an entire two hours all he said to me was: "So...how are you?" when Becca, Downzie and Katy wandered off in front, and then when I said to Becca I was gonna go in a while he suggested he walk with me, as seen as his house was on the way and he needed to go to home for some reason and then he would go back into town. He actually went off before me, but the same time I wanted to leave, so I waited for him to walk out the upper exit of the Brunswick and then legged it to the lower floor and came out the other entrance, closest to the direction we both wanted to be in, and I walked quite fast as so to avoid him, but he ran up behind me and started to walk with me. I didn't mind at first, but then we came to the road where we could go two ways, one where he would come out on his street and the other going along the road going past his house. So of course as he headed towards the first option, I quickly took the second, but he said "Oh, are you going that way? I'll come with you." and followed. We carried on walking and he asked what was wrong with me and why I was so quiet, and I just said I was feeling a bit out of it, using the period pains I'd had that weekend as my cover, and he gave me a hug. I returned it, but pulled away quicker than normal and carried on walking, and he put his arm round my waist! Usually I would do the same to him, but I kinda refused and then gave him a quick hug outside his house and walked off quickly...baring in mind I didn't make eye-contact with him once, he didn't seem to bothered what was actually wrong with me...even when I hugged him I just turned my head right away from him, as normally when we pull away from a hug we end up getting off, so that left him kinda thrown, and when I didn't put my arm around his waist, he sorta started to pull away, as if unsure, put then put if back, holding me a little closer. It's damn confusing!
Anyway, Elliot is convinced that he's fallen in love with me, but as I myself was one a screaming fangirl (oh, the shame!), I know what it's like to IMAGINE or THINK you're in love. He actually might be, and I've always believed you could fall in love even at our age (even though he's in the year above me), but it just doesn't seem likely for some reason. He's in Kenya at the moment anyway and has called and txt me everyday except yesterday and today, but I think he's in trouble for putting £45 on his dad's phone just on Thursday and using it to call me...in all he reckons he's used over £100 contacting me since he went on...erm...Saturday? And he's bought me an 18kr gold bracelet AND wants me to go to New York and Canada for 9 days in April, and I don't have to pay for the plane or anything. I don't think it's a very good idea, I don't want him to get the WRONG idea...He's practically begging me to go out with him, and it feels like he's bribing me, but I just don't want to go out with him. I honestly don't really see him in that way. At all.
And then there's Chris, which is another reason not to go out with Elliot. I sorta vowed to myself that I would be single when I go to see him in April, after he had that as one of his New Years Resolutions...I have another photo of him too, in this random little hat his mum knitted him, it looks kinda cute though...
I've made up with Becca, but she now knows exactly what I've done with Barker *cough*...and she let Downzie find out, who told Ozzy and Kerrie. Ozzy told like all of them lot and keeps asking me about it, and Kerrie told Sarah and Angela. Annabelle heard me and Becca talking about it, and now Amy and Abby know too. And also Craig Blair, who goes to my school but is friends with Elliot, has got the idea I did stuff with Elliot too. Which is ALMOST true. He wanted me to do stuff, but I definately did not! Thankfully...
I'm not being to hard on Kerrie about telling people though, as I found out the reason her mum split up with Dave last year, after 9 years, is that he went into Kerrie's room on a night and tried it on with her...that's when there was all the stuff about Becca going on, 'cause she started telling people that she's been beaten up and abused as a kid, 'cause she didn't like the attention Kerrie was getting 'cause of it. Kerrie had to talk to police and counsellors and everything...
I'll post again some time soon, when I've organised my life a bit for a whole New Year!
I think we wanted different things, 'cause he completely ignores me when his friends are there (except Dash), but then when we're alone it's a battle to get him away from me! For example:
On Wednesday night I decided I was going to come to my dad's house, as my internet wire at my mum's is broken, and Becca was going into town so I agreed I'd hang out with them for a while. Anyway, it turned out Barker was with them and in an entire two hours all he said to me was: "So...how are you?" when Becca, Downzie and Katy wandered off in front, and then when I said to Becca I was gonna go in a while he suggested he walk with me, as seen as his house was on the way and he needed to go to home for some reason and then he would go back into town. He actually went off before me, but the same time I wanted to leave, so I waited for him to walk out the upper exit of the Brunswick and then legged it to the lower floor and came out the other entrance, closest to the direction we both wanted to be in, and I walked quite fast as so to avoid him, but he ran up behind me and started to walk with me. I didn't mind at first, but then we came to the road where we could go two ways, one where he would come out on his street and the other going along the road going past his house. So of course as he headed towards the first option, I quickly took the second, but he said "Oh, are you going that way? I'll come with you." and followed. We carried on walking and he asked what was wrong with me and why I was so quiet, and I just said I was feeling a bit out of it, using the period pains I'd had that weekend as my cover, and he gave me a hug. I returned it, but pulled away quicker than normal and carried on walking, and he put his arm round my waist! Usually I would do the same to him, but I kinda refused and then gave him a quick hug outside his house and walked off quickly...baring in mind I didn't make eye-contact with him once, he didn't seem to bothered what was actually wrong with me...even when I hugged him I just turned my head right away from him, as normally when we pull away from a hug we end up getting off, so that left him kinda thrown, and when I didn't put my arm around his waist, he sorta started to pull away, as if unsure, put then put if back, holding me a little closer. It's damn confusing!
Anyway, Elliot is convinced that he's fallen in love with me, but as I myself was one a screaming fangirl (oh, the shame!), I know what it's like to IMAGINE or THINK you're in love. He actually might be, and I've always believed you could fall in love even at our age (even though he's in the year above me), but it just doesn't seem likely for some reason. He's in Kenya at the moment anyway and has called and txt me everyday except yesterday and today, but I think he's in trouble for putting £45 on his dad's phone just on Thursday and using it to call me...in all he reckons he's used over £100 contacting me since he went on...erm...Saturday? And he's bought me an 18kr gold bracelet AND wants me to go to New York and Canada for 9 days in April, and I don't have to pay for the plane or anything. I don't think it's a very good idea, I don't want him to get the WRONG idea...He's practically begging me to go out with him, and it feels like he's bribing me, but I just don't want to go out with him. I honestly don't really see him in that way. At all.
And then there's Chris, which is another reason not to go out with Elliot. I sorta vowed to myself that I would be single when I go to see him in April, after he had that as one of his New Years Resolutions...I have another photo of him too, in this random little hat his mum knitted him, it looks kinda cute though...
I've made up with Becca, but she now knows exactly what I've done with Barker *cough*...and she let Downzie find out, who told Ozzy and Kerrie. Ozzy told like all of them lot and keeps asking me about it, and Kerrie told Sarah and Angela. Annabelle heard me and Becca talking about it, and now Amy and Abby know too. And also Craig Blair, who goes to my school but is friends with Elliot, has got the idea I did stuff with Elliot too. Which is ALMOST true. He wanted me to do stuff, but I definately did not! Thankfully...
I'm not being to hard on Kerrie about telling people though, as I found out the reason her mum split up with Dave last year, after 9 years, is that he went into Kerrie's room on a night and tried it on with her...that's when there was all the stuff about Becca going on, 'cause she started telling people that she's been beaten up and abused as a kid, 'cause she didn't like the attention Kerrie was getting 'cause of it. Kerrie had to talk to police and counsellors and everything...
I'll post again some time soon, when I've organised my life a bit for a whole New Year!
posted by Leigh at 3:11 AM
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
<< Home